Rees' Namesake ... In Memory ...

Dennis Rees (1/6/1937 - 7/29/2014)

Today marks one year since you went to be with Jesus.  You are the first person whose passing makes me long for heaven ... The distance alone whilst you were still here was always difficult for me … but the permanent absence has been … well, …

(Cnicht Mountain in Snowdonia, North Wales)

Completed in the place where my memories of you live … I wanted a proper “farewell”.   Being forced from here to let go of you there … well, it’s never really felt “done”.

(Llyn Llagi (lake) stands just north of the summit of Cnicht; 

these photos are internet photos of the "area" where Dennis' ashes were scattered)

I fully intended to be “there” on this day ... to travel to the spot that embraced the last bit of your physical existence ... a favourite place where you held wonderful memories and feelings of peace.  And, yet, it still goes undone …

Earlier this year, we made the decision to adopt again and this decision makes my intended travels to the UK less feasible.  I am disappointed … yes … but … the knowledge that my intent was rather selfish and that our adoption decision is the exact opposite … I guess, evens out my emotions. 

I am still reminded of you in so many ways …

Earlier this year we saw the new movie about the classic story of Paddington Bear.  There I was, sitting in the dark movie theater, tears streaming down my face as the voices of Uncle Pastuzo and Aunt Lucy made me feel as though you and Maureen were right there in the room with me.  Then we even watched the movie again when it came out on DVD and I still couldn’t stop the tears in its first fifteen minutes. 

Other movies with a British tone also remind me of you.  You are “Beaver” in Narnia: The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe and I hear you in the fun, animated movie Flushed Away when the term “Toe-Rag” is used!!

… I also purposely remind myself of you in many other ways …

Yorkshire Tea, according to you, only the best tea worthy of drinking,... later you preferred Chai, which is now the one I like best too.  Every cup is a cup shared with you.

Scones and Welsh Cakes - my favorite British treats!!  Several years ago, you and Maureen sent a cookbook that has traditional recipes for Scones and biscuits and other pastries.  You also emailed the recipe for Welsh Cakes (my absolute FAVOURITE) because it would be much easier for me to make my own than have you go to Wales to purchase a packet and send them through the post.

It took me several years to attempt that recipe and once I did ... oh boy ... it was the greatest treasure ever!  I have since made them many times and ALL who eat them absolutely ADORE them nearly as much as I do.  I'm sure it's because they "taste" the love and admiration that goes into them as I always think upon you and Maureen as I prepare the treasured recipe.

I have a special shelf with four full scrapbooks of times spent with you, souvenir books we bought and also those you gave us as well as several favourite photos.

My Welsh Lovespoon collection … two of which were gifts from you ... special reminders of special visits to a place of beauty and peace.

One year you sent me this book about Lovespoons with a special lovespoon as well ...

In the pages of the book you/Maureen marked the meanings of the designs in the spoon ...

- the cross represents "together in Christ" - 

- the links represent "we cannot be separated" - 

Maybe only to me, perhaps, you referred to me as “our daughter in Wisconsin” … you had your own children there and I always wished I’d known them better and I have my own parents here, who were fortunate to have met you … but you certainly were like another father to me, the one who listened, advised, suggested and supported … always with confidence and love and from a perspective of our common faith.  That always meant so much to me!

Knowing you changed my whole life … the both of you … my Dad and Mum in Christ.  So much of what I learned from and experienced with you became a significant part of who I am right now. 

As it begins to seem as though it was all a part of my imagination … I am fearful of you becoming a far and distant memory.  I do not want to forget ... with time and age and as the seasons change, I cannot allow myself to forget.

The younger of the boys we are in process to adopt … he will be my forever reminder and the namesake of a most precious part of my life … 

There, your children and grandchildren carry you with them and you live on through them.  Here, this side of "the pond", as England grows further and further away from me, Rees Solomon will be my memorial link to knowing you; he will be my constant reminder and you will live on in this little boy who already appears to possess the spirit of your name.

I am pleased to know the name Rees means "Ardent, Fiery". 

Synonyms of Ardent include "passionate", "enthusiastic", "devoted" and Fiery means "spirited", "intense" and "to burn bright".  I believe that these words will actually describe our Boy Rees one day.  We will tell him all about you and Maureen and we will share with him how special you were to us and why we named him after you.  

He will also have the name Solomon.  You told me once that you thought I should read the book of Ecclesiastes, which I did.  King Solomon is named as author of the book and Ecclesiastes 11:4 is actually the verse that propelled us to pursue this current adoption.  I don't know for certain your reason in asking me to read Ecclesiastes but its overarching theme is that "nothing means anything without the LORD".  

It was ONLY because of the LORD that our lives ever touched on June 25, 2004 and I am certain that the significance of our friendship is reinforced by our connection with the LORD. 

And that is what I will cling to ... the LORD ... because with the LORD is where you are and with all the regrets, tears, and wishes for "one more" this or that ... those bits will all disappear and all that will remain is the beauty and unspeakable joy that is our connection to one another BECAUSE OF OUR LORD.  I will see you again and I'll spend the rest of my life reminding myself ...